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Cowboy Poetry and Western Verse
The Fastest Gun
By Mike Berger
Lightning fast would be a gross
understatement. He could draw,
shoot and replace his gun in
less than a second. Pedro was
an ugly man both inside and out.
He operated outside the law and
had notches in his gun to prove it.
The law was after him but he was
cunning. He was always one step
ahead.
He was especially mean when he
got liquored up. He would shoot
you if you look at him twice. He was
a legend in his own time. His speed
with a gun maybe people call him Sir.
Pedro got old and lost his edge. He
was forced to retire. His shooting hand
had arthritis and he was gimpy and
lame. They once called him the fastest
gun in the West but now they just call
him no toes Gonzalez.
Paycooos Bill
By Mike Berger
Bill was bad,
mean and vile.
He stood just five foot
four and had a lot
to prove.
He was fast on the
draw and was a dead
shot. Nobody tangled
with Bill.
Two front teeth were
missing from a fight
in a saloon. A deep red
scar ran from his ear
to his chin.
He made his living by
robbing banks. He spent
his "earnings" on whiskey
and wild women.
No one dared call Bill out.
He gunned down a dozen
men who tried. He was fast
but his real advantage was
that he wasn't much of a
target.
Paycooos died an ignoble
death. He was shot and died
on the spot. No it wasn't a sheriff,
a bank teller or one of the Pinkerton
boys. He took two blasts from a
double barreled twelve gauge.
He was crawling out of a bedroom
window with his pants down to
his knees and was shot by a
jealous husband.
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